Learning to Lean

I love the words of this song 'learning to lean' by Heritage Singers (see link below).
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7dHBtdsAGW8

It comes to me that depending on God teaches us the meaning of true dependence on God. It reminds me that to be connected to God is to be plugged in to the eternal power source. He will give us more power than we have ever know. Power to witness, work for him, to have faith, to work miracles to so all that he wills for us and so on.

Once we have decided to make him our Lord and saviour, we embark on a journey. This is a lifelong journey and is 'travelled by the human heart'. In this journey we must rely fully on him. The moment we lose sight of him, we will get lost and become powerless. Every time we feel a disconnection we must run back and reconnect to Jesus and lean on him. I love how faithful and trust worthy he is. Thank you Jesus for being not only my saviour, my Lord but also my friend.

Bible study

Lesson 8

The Sabbath School Lesson for this week. Interesting stuff!

LESSONS FROM NICODEMUS: Extracts from Desire of ages by Ellen G White p167-173

"Nicodemus held a high position of trust in the Jewish nation. He was highly educated, and possessed talents of no ordinary character, and he was an honored member of the national council. With others, he had been stirred by the teaching of Jesus. Though rich, learned, and honored, he had been strangely attracted by the humble Nazarene. The lessons that had fallen from the Saviour's lips had greatly impressed him, and he desired to learn more of these wonderful truths.

Since hearing Jesus, Nicodemus had anxiously studied the prophecies relating to the Messiah; and the more he searched, the stronger was his conviction that this was the One who was to come. With many others in Israel he had been greatly distressed by the profanation of the temple He was a witness of the scene when Jesus drove out the buyers and the sellers; he beheld the wonderful manifestation of divine power; he saw the Saviour receiving the poor and healing the sick; he saw their looks of joy, and heard their words of praise; and he could not doubt that Jesus of Nazareth was the Sent of God. 

He greatly desired an interview with Jesus, but shrank from seeking Him openly. It would be too humiliating for a ruler of the Jews to acknowledge himself in sympathy with a teacher as yet so little known. And should his visit come to the knowledge of the Sanhedrin, it would draw upon him their scorn and denunciation. He resolved upon a secret interview, excusing this on the ground that if he were to goopenly, others might follow his example. Learning by special inquiry the Saviour's place of retirement in the Mount of Olives, he waited until the city was hushed in slumber, and then sought Him. 

In the presence of Christ, Nicodemus felt a strange timidity, which he endeavored to conceal under an air of composure and dignity. "Rabbi," he said, "we know that Thou art a teacher come from God: for no man can do these miracles that Thou doest, except God be with him." By speaking of Christ's rare gifts as a teacher, and also of His wonderful power to perform miracles, he hoped to pave the way for his interview. His words were designed to express and to invite confidence; but they really expressed unbelief. He did not acknowledge Jesus to be the Messiah, but only a teacher sent from God. 

Instead of recognizing this salutation, Jesus bent His eyes upon the speaker, as if reading his very soul. In His infinite wisdom He saw before Him a seeker after truth. He knew the object of this visit, and with a desire to deepen the conviction already resting upon His listener's mind, He came directly to the point, saying solemnly, yet kindly, "Verily, verily, I say unto thee, Except a man be born from above, he cannot see the kingdom of God." John 3:3, margin.

Nicodemus had come to the Lord thinking to enter into a discussion with Him, but Jesus laid bare the foundation principles of truth. He said to Nicodemus, It is not theoretical knowledge you need so much as spiritual regeneration. You need not to have your curiosity satisfied, but to have a new heart. You must receive a new life from above before you can appreciate heavenly things. Until this change takes place, making all things new, it will result in no saving good for you to discuss with Me My authority or My mission. 

Nicodemus had heard the preaching of John the Baptist concerning repentance and baptism, and pointing the people to One who should baptize with the Holy Spirit. He himself had felt that there was a lack of spirituality among the Jews, that, to a great degree,they were controlled by bigotry and worldly ambition. He had hoped for a better state of things at the Messiah's coming. Yet the heart-searching message of the Baptist had failed to work in him conviction of sin. He was a strict Pharisee, and prided himself on his good works. He was widely esteemed for his benevolence and his liberality in sustaining the temple service, and he felt secure of the favor of God. He was startled at the thought of a kingdom too pure for him to see in his present state. 

The figure of the new birth, which Jesus had used, was not wholly unfamiliar to Nicodemus. Converts from heathenism to the faith of Israel were often compared to children just born. Therefore he must have perceived that the words of Christ were not to be taken in a literal sense. But by virtue of his birth as an Israelite he regarded himself as sure of a place in the kingdom of God. He felt that he needed no change. Hence his surprise at the Saviour's words. He was irritated by their close application to himself, The pride of the Pharisee was struggling against the honest desire of the seeker after truth. He wondered that Christ should speak to him as He did, not respecting his position as ruler in Israel. 

Surprised out of his self-possession, he answered Christ in words full of irony, "How can a man be born when he is old?" Like many others when cutting truth is brought home to the conscience, he revealed the fact that the natural man receiveth not the things of the Spirit of God. There is in him nothing that responds to spiritual things; for spiritual things are spiritually discerned. But the Saviour did not meet argument with argument. Raising His hand with solemn, quiet dignity, He pressed the truth home with greater assurance, "Verily, verily, I say unto thee, Except a man be born of water and of the Spirit, he cannot enter into the kingdom of God." Nicodemus knew that Christ here referred to water baptism and the renewing of the heart by the Spirit of God. He was convinced that he was in the presence of the One whom John the Baptist had foretold. 

Jesus continued: "That which is born of the flesh is flesh; and that which is born of the Spirit is spirit." By nature the heart is evil, and "who can bring a clean thing out of an unclean? not one." Job 14:4. No human invention can find a remedy for the sinning soul. "The carnal mind is enmity against God: for it is not subject to the law of God, neither indeed can be." "Out of the heart proceed evil thoughts, murders, adulteries, fornications, thefts, false witness, blasphemies." Rom. 8:7; Matt. 15:19. The fountain of the heart must be purified before the streams can become pure. He who is trying to reach heaven by his own works in keeping the law is attempting an impossibility. There is no safety for one who has merely a legal religion, a form of godliness. The Christian's life is not a modification or improvement of the old, but a transformation of nature. There is a death to self and sin, and a new life altogether. This change can be brought about only by the effectual working of the Holy Spirit. Nicodemus was still perplexed, and Jesus used the wind to illustrate His meaning: "The wind bloweth where it listeth, and thou hearest the sound thereof, but canst not tell whence it cometh, and whither it goeth: so is everyone that is born of the Spirit."

The wind is heard among the branches of the trees, rustling the leaves and flowers; yet it is invisible, and no man knows whence it comes or whither it goes. So with the work of the Holy Spirit upon the heart. It can no more be explained than can the movements of the wind. A person may not be able to tell the exact time or place, or to trace all the circumstances in the process of conversion; but this does not prove him to be unconverted. By an agency as unseen as the wind, Christ is constantly working upon the heart. Little by little, perhaps unconsciously to the receiver, impressions are made that tend to draw the soul to Christ. These may be received through meditating upon Him, through reading the Scriptures, or through hearing the word from the living preacher. Suddenly, as the Spirit comes with more direct appeal, the soul gladly surrenders itself to Jesus. By many this is called sudden conversion; but it is the result of long wooing by the Spirit of God,--a patient, protracted process While the wind is itself invisible, it produces effects that are seen and felt. So the work of the Spirit upon the soul will reveal itself in every act of him who has felt its saving power. When the Spirit of God takes possession of the heart, it transforms the life. Sinful thoughts are put away, evil deeds are renounced; love, humility, and peace take the place of anger, envy, and strife. Joy takes the place of sadness, and the countenance reflects the light of heaven. No one sees the hand that lifts the burden, or beholds the light descend from the courts above. The blessing comes when by faith the soul surrenders itself to God. Then that power which no human eye can see creates a new being in the image of God. 

It is impossible for finite minds to comprehend the work of redemption. Its mystery exceeds human knowledge; yet he who passes from death to life realizes that it is a divine reality. The beginning of redemption we may know here through a personal experience. Its results reach through the eternal ages. 

While Jesus was speaking, some gleams of truth penetrated the ruler's mind. The softening, subduing influence of the Holy Spirit impressed his heart. Yet he did not fully understand the Saviour's words. He was not so much impressed by the necessity of the new birth as by the manner of its accomplishment. He said wonderingly, "How can these things be?" "Art thou a master of Israel, and knowest not these things?" Jesus asked. Surely one entrusted with the religious instruction of the people should not be ignorant of truths so important. His words conveyed the lesson that instead of feeling irritated over the plain words of truth, Nicodemus should have had a very humble opinion of himself, because of his spiritual ignorance. Yet Christ spoke with such solemn dignity, and both look and tone expressed such earnest love, that Nicodemus was not offended as he realized his humiliating condition."

(White Ellen G. Desire of Ages pp167-173)

Jesus speaks with unwavering and earnest love to us today. Unless we be born again, we cannot enter the kingdom of heaven. We must be born of water and the Holy Spirit and experience a new birth through the same Holy Spirit, accepting his redemptive sacrifice on calvary on our behalf. He is waiting for us...wont you accept Jesus into your heart today as your personal Saviour and experience this new creation/birth?

2 Cor 5:17  Therefore if any man be in Christ, he is a new creature: old things are passed away; behold, all things are become new. 

LOVE AND RESPECT:This could positively change your life and relationship

Successful couples know that harmony and happiness in marriage are not achieved by love alone. There is the other side of the Ephesians 5:33 equation - respect. Yes, a wife needs love. But a husband needs respect. Based on extensive biblical and scientific research, Dr. Emerson Eggerichs reveals the secret to couples meeting each other's deepest needs: Without love she reacts without respect, and without respect he reacts without love and a destructive, vicious cycle begins. Love and Respect is a groundbreaking book, to be featured on Focus on the Family, which offers much-needed help to husbands and wives everywhere. It introduces the biblical teaching of unconditional respect, and that it is as powerful as unconditional love. Discover the secret revealed by God that cracks the communication code between male and female and reap the benefits of marriage as God intended.


Here are some links
taking responsibility for our responces
spiderwebbing

Download this mp3 from Abemp3.com

Adventists' back-to-basics faith is fastest growing U.S. church - USATODAY.com

Adventists' back-to-basics faith is fastest growing U.S. church - USATODAY.com

Making new friends

I love making new friends, discovering new characters and making new connections. When I settle on a friend, I make them fro life. Yeah, sure, there are different categories of "friends" ranging form acquaintances to buddies but real friends are like gold. I am lucky  enough to have a few whom i treasure. This week I made a new friend and i must say this one promises to make my friends hall of fame lol!

2011

HAPPY NEW YEAR ONE AND ALL!!!!

This being my first entry for 2011 I thought it appropriate to start this way. I have had an interesting  and challenging 2010 and i hope 2011 will be even better. I pray that it is for me and all those I know and love.

I pray for a strongerrelationship with God and my family, my man and my friends. May God's will be done in my life in this year and may i be a blessing to somone this year.

I resolve to be the best ME that I can be.

Be blessed!!
xxxxx

YouTube - 7 Scientific Reasons To Not Believe In Evolution

YouTube - 7 Scientific Reasons To Not Believe In Evolution

YouTube - Satan's Spokeperson

YouTube - Satan's Spokeperson: Oprah Winfrey

People time is short. Jesus is coming back. People like Oprah are leading people astray with their new age doctrines and are ultimately serving the Devil. There IS only one way and that is Jesus Christ our Lord and Saviour.

Many people wander after the beast and the false prophet. Read your bible and pray to the God o heaven in the name of Jesus Christ who died for us to know the truth. Dont listen to man, listen to God.

My heart

My heart is so full I can hardly contain it in my chest. My love for you is growing out of control and I love it!!

Let my heart be freed and dance around in bliss....fall into your arms where I am safe and loved.

Untitled

I move towards my goal

Step towards my vision

I aim to fulfil my dreams and quench my heart’s burnin’

Yet, everywhere are obstacles

The hinder, blind, confuse and hurt me

They leave me feeling a little afraid if the goal before is an attainable one.

Can I really look forward to my heart’s dream?

Can I finally have what I have already tasted but haven’t had?

Will I be able to do this with dignity, grace and a smile on my face?

They scream unworthy and remind me I am unclean

But the Lord whispers mercy

And pronounces me worthy

In spite of all that they see as making me undeserving.

But you, that love me and see the Good in me,

are here doing just that when I needed you the most.

Thank you for everything.

Thank you for being part of the dream

For being the dream.

Banquets, goodbye and other things

SO! I went to the Universitas seventh-Day Adventist yesr end function AKA the Banquet.  It was great. The first time I have allowed myself to cut loose in a long time. It was great fun. I was with my girl Z whom i may not be seeing for a while since this is her finaly year. She has completed her Honors degree and is leaving. Sob! sob! Sniff sniff! waaah! I am really going to miss her. The banquet was the last time we got to hang out properly...i cherisehd every moment. Of course being teh darling that she is, she came by yesterday to see me and say our last good bye's. I will miss her but I know i have a friend in her. Our times together and our memories, no one can take away from us. We will always have them.

Love you girl!!

Who Understands me the most?

Only God knows what is in my heart
He sees my secret thoughts and the desires of my heart
My intentions are laid bare before him
He knows my past and my future
And cares deeply, beyond human understanding 
So i guess he is the only one who really truly will understand each of us. 
Its comforting to know

You amaze me!!!

I am so amazed at your goodness

The depth of your love astounds me

I could look forever and never find the bottom of your love

Or the height of your mercy

Dear Lord I thank you

For your faithfulness to me

For the way that you give and keep on giving to me

Love, grace. mercy. truth. Justice.hope. faith are mine in your name

What could I lack when I have you?

What could my soul long for?

For my deepest desires you have fulfilled 

In your profound knowledge have withheld what i ought not to have

I trust you completely

I trust you implicitly

I trust you forever for my life you hold in your hands

And my future is plain before your sight

I could write forever Lord

But what i really mean to say is

YOU AMAZE ME

Humbly,

Your child and grateful servant, 

Alinane

A prayer away- A word of courage and hope for a heart that's blue

You can feel all alone in a crowd
Loneliness can eat away at you while surrounded by people

When the tears start to flow and you feel afraid
when you are feeling lost
When you dont think anyone really cares
Jesus does and he is only a prayer away

He will wipe your tears and calm your fears
He wil fill your heart with Joy and peace
And cover your soul with love everlating
You need not be afraid,
Jesus is only a prayer away

Pour out your heart to him
He will never disappoint
He is faithful and merciful
His heart is moved with compassion and touched with your grief

So dont just stay there feeling blue, call to Jesus he will find  way to rescue you
When you are at your lowest call on him he is only a prayer away.

Virtuous woman part2

A virtuous woman is not afraid of hard work. She can see clearly what must be done and gets to it. A woman of dexterity and skill at whatever she chooses or life has bestowed upon her to do...taking her time to gain prowess. A virtuous woman does whatever her hands find to do to the best of her ability, and does so with joy and quietness of spirit.

A virtuous woman loves one man. She is faithful and loyal to one husband. She does not let pride get in the way of love. She is to be found with a virtuous man for her character would not allow otherwise. She loves and obeys her husband whom she prays for constantly.

This woman knows that to live is to learn. She therefore is open to learning new things and ways of doing and thinking. A good woman is nice but a virtuous woman is priceless.

Her first line of defence is upon her knees. She seeks the Lord while he may be found, constantly bent over in contrition, worship or thanksgiving.

He who has found a virtuous woman has found a great thing.

Lord please make me a virtuous woman. 

SOME THOUGHTS ON WHAT IT MEANS TO BE AFRICAN part 1

Ali awiri ndi anthu aliyekha nchinyama-Where there are two (people) they are human where there is one, he/she is an animal.

Umunthu ngumunthu ngabantu/motho ke motho ka batho ka bang.= loosely translated we are people because of other people.

Such proverbs embody the belief that the individual identity is a function of the collective relationship. It is only through a sharing of common humanity that a person becomes fully human (Lavine 2005). Simply put, these African sayings point to a deep belief in community: We are, therefore I am.

Without participating in community and the unity thereof, a person’s personhood/humanity/Umunthu is questionable. He or she never learns how a person should behave to qualify as “human(e)”. Indeed that one person in some African cultures is referred to as being animalistic or beastly in nature, lacking in humanity (Umunthu).

Proverbs or sayings in the African context are deeply meaningful and didactic in nature. They reveal the African philosophy of life. They are descriptive as well as prescriptive and instructional. They are also one of the vehicles through which philosophy of life and the African culture is passed on and perpetuated.  

Here are more African proverbs from Malawi. These particular ones are chosen for their specific illustration of the community emphasis as explained above:

Mutu umodzi siusenza denga – one head cannot carry a roof

It takes more than one person to get the job done. A job is better done if more than one person does it. This is especially true to such taxing work like lifting a roof. This is more than just ‘team work’ although that is part of it. It is about acknowledging the need for community for support, and survival.

Mzati umodzi siumanga nyumba-a house cannot be built on one supporting pillar.

An English equivalent in terms of the essential message is “united we stand divided we fall”. The explanation for this saying is similar to the one given above. For people to build a strong and reliable structure, they need to have more that just one beam to hold up the house. Supporting beams and other structural additions are necessary. This also points to the importance of every individual in the community. If everyone does their part, then the community, like the house built with so many different materials, will stand. Some are like the mud or clay, some like the twigs, thatching grass, main and supporting beams of the house. But all are playing a role without which the house cannot stand or will be weak. There is also a kind of work ethic being espoused here. If you do your part and I do mine, things will work.

Ichi nchiyani nkulinga muli awiri-“what is this” is a question that can be asked when there are two of you.

When one encounters a new or unusual phenomenon, they will want someone to help them figure it out or offer an explanation. Again there is a hint of two heads are better than one in this saying. Apart from this, problem solving is also portrayed as a team sport.

Lende nkukankhana: in order to ride a see-saw the person on each end must ‘push’ for the game to continue (another way of interpreting this is to refer to a swing on which one usually pushes another.)

For things to work, people must help each other. Another idea embedded here is that people must pull their weight. You will notice that a see-saw only allows one person to ‘swing’ at a time. You push so that your ‘friend’ (meaning counterpart another reference to African thinking. The other person is called nzako meaning friend) can enjoy then next it will be your turn. Notice also how a see-saw requires you use your whole weight in most cases to push the other side up. I would say this means that one has to be fully vested in the community.

You rely and depend on the other person to do their part. And you acknowledge that when you do yours you are essentially ensuring your own enjoyment because someone else will also push you when its your turn. This saying also speaks of a kind of patience in waiting for your turn to come as not everyone can have their ‘fun’ at the same time as in the analogy of the see-saw. But the assurance is that if the other people are human(e) then you will get  your turn. What ensures this humanity in people is belonging to community which teaches values, responsibility, togetherness, teamwork, moral uprightness and humility.

If ‘lende’ is understood as a swing, then it follows that only one person at a tie can get on one. But he needs the help of another to push him. While on the swing the individual has fun but never forgets that he is having fun because there is someone toiling on their behalf. This lends humility and appreciation to proceedings. Again if standing at a particular vintage point, another person may only see the one in the swing as they are raised high above everyone else but does see the pusher. As such this is also a reminder for those who are ‘flying high’ to remember their roots; To remember who pushed for them to get so high. This will keep them grounded and human(e).

Apart from proverbs, there are certain phenomena that may not make sense to a cultural outsider which tell of the belief in community as a humaning agent as well as a support system for each member.

Let me start by saying that because of this emphasis on the ‘we’ my joy becomes your joy, my suffering is your suffering. Chadza pano nchatonse (whatever has come here is for all of us) is a proverb that illustrates this well. It means that whatever happens to me or you or them is happening to us. Whether that thing is good or bad, for better or worse we will deal with it or enjoy it together. For when a good thing happens it affects us all by extension of belonging to the community and humanity as a whole.

When a person dies in the community, it is a message that is quickly passed around to all who are in the community as well as relatives and friends. They all come together to support the bereaved immediate family but also feel bereaved themselves as they have lost a “limb”- a part of the community. They interacted with this person in different communal activities. The chief is alerted because as their overall superior he should know all that is happening in his area and must be seen to participate and be a part of all significant occasions in this area. Not showing up at the funeral; not showing sorrow/a sad countenance; rejoicing or celebrating while others are in mourning; not, at least, contributing materially to the proceedings is heavily frowned upon. This shows that you are not ‘about’ the community. You don’t care what happens to the other person and therefore lack ‘umunthu’. To be human is to sympathise and assist when others are in trouble. To be human is not to rejoice in the face of sorrow as if to belittle the pain of others which is really your own pain. A good illustration is how when a person steps on thorn, only the foot has been pricked but the whole person is affected and suffers. The person is not at peace until the thorn is removed, the wound soothed and healed, for only then does the pain truly cease.

In many situations that I have observes, if a person habitually does what is frowned upon, people will sabotage their events as well. The community shows its disapproval by withholding similar things. Some may not show up for the funeral or may stay just a little bit. Maybe they wont be singing as they would have is you had not acted that way. However they will not leave you completely alone. For that is inhumane. They remember though you did someone wrong you are still in mourning and still in need of assistance. And they hope that you will learn your lesson from that experience. To be sure the close relatives and immediate neighbours will likely be present through out. At times, the chief may, in his customary speech, say things that refer to the action the offender did or didn’t do. For example he will say:

“when things of this nature happens, it is important for us to all be present (hmm and hums of agreement from those gathered can be heard). We must support each other for the burden of death is great and the sorrow can crush us. The people gathered here mourn with you”

Speeches like that in these particular situations may pointedly be aimed at offenders (actual or potential). This is never done in malice of contempt but as a way of teaching. The elder or chief speaks and owing to his position the people listen and know that his words are wise. Apart from this, the person who has offended is believed to possess enough ‘humanity’ to acknowledge and change their behaviour. To those in the gathering who do not know of the situation, the speech is general and just reiterates what they all know should be. As such there is no ridicule intended but as the saying goes, ‘wankulu siauzidwa’- a person who is old enough need not be told. In this case he need not be told that this is about you and that if you don’t change blah blah blah. A person who is old enough will receive the message and use it. This would be as opposed to a child who may not yet be steeped in the ways of the people or may not yet be expected to perform certain duties. But a person who is old enough knows what is expected of them. Partially perhaps because they have undergone initiation and all the rites of passage appropriate for their age and station and as such know how an elder speaks (kuyankhula mwachikulu) when he seeks to make a point. If an close elder is present, and the people concerned are young and may not understand or know, the elder is expected to speak with the younger folk at another time and explain why the chief said what he did and why it is important to do the right thing. Not for the sake of doing it but because it is what is human and what is good and what is acceptable and what is what they too (in the immediate situation) wanted. A ‘do unto others’ kind of approach which to the young though still not fully mature, already makes sense since they have already been enculturated/socialized in this way of life. They already know what it means to say “kumeneko sikukhala” that is not how to live. While this may cause discomfort or some embarrassment, it is ‘balmed’ by the presence of the people and their (genuine) assistance and support. It is also counted upon that the person’s discomfort will remind them not to forget to do what is right.   

The same goes for situations where there is rejoicing. People don’t need invitations to attend a wedding celebrations, ceremony or feast. The families are expected to provide food for all who come. Eating together is part of communal bonding. Their friends, neighbours and wider community contributes food stuffs, utensils and their services so that there is no lack of food. Where there is a gathering, people must eat together and maybe drink together. In Malawi, people expect to drink thobwa (a traditional beverage which can be fermented into traditional beer) or in the modern times, soft drinks and other not-so-soft drink (!).So there is much dancing, singing and general hilarity during weddings. The bride and groom are treated with special favour and so are their parents who are honoured for having raised their children into upstanding member of the community. Their upstanding nature is announced by their decision to wed, a choice that is approved as opposed to eloping or promiscuity. Marriage is also a rite of passage which is cause for celebration. There is also celebration because the two families of the newlyweds are now one family. They celebrate their union and get to know each other better as has already been happening before the wedding through other interaction. The parents of the bride and groom call each other “sewere” in Chichewa. I do not know the apt translation but I hazard a loose and literal translation. Kusewera  means to play. And I am guessing “sewere” means play mate though I don’t know the history behind this. After the wedding, the two families are expected to behave as a united family. They become relatives (kumanga ubale).

These are some of the ways in which Africans/Malawians live, their philosophy of life manifests and is perpetuated. Community and its requirements ‘outrank’ the individual but individuals find their being and fulfilment in community. This may be hard for a cultural outsider to grasp especially if they are of the western school of thought where individuality and individual freedoms are highly regarded and guide society. Let me point out here, rather emphatically, that communal living does not preclude individual identity or selfhood. It in fact engender it. It is the understand in of all members that they find their personhood in the community and the community is fully realized through the different persons that live in it.

Communication: I am just saying.....

The way i see it, communication is key.

Choose your words well and dont mind repeating and explaining until the other person gets it.After all you wish to be heard and understood eti? put in the work.

On the other hand, If you dont chose your words well, dont blame others if they misunderstand you. That person does not always have a personal vandetta against you or isnt just out to turn things around on you. Probably a good thought to have it "oh i didnt communicate well there. this person has misunderstood me". Just clarify what you really meant and move on

it s not always that munthuyo ndiwosanva kapena wovuta koma kuti communication inavuta. We should work hard to get better at communication and not make excuses for our shortfalls.Lets not say  pajatu communication imandivuta. That way we will never get better. 

If you say you look like a monkey, how many different ways are there to understand that? Then if someone says are you saying i am a monkey you get insulted because they misunderstood you? what you really meant was that the  person was wearing a scarf like the one your aunt's monkey wears....Obviously communication siyinayende bwino pamanepo. so instead of sulking kuti how could you think i meant that, learn to say the right words for what you really mean. 

Granted it comes with practice, so practice. No one is perfect......

But dont make excuses for yourself if you are falling short in expressing your thoughts accurately. Work at it. 

After all apart from our thoughts, feelings and words, there are few other things that are as personal to us. So i can imagine it is important to you that you are heard and understood. The communication of yourself is YOUR responsibility, not anyone else's. 

So put in the work.

I am just saying........

Spiritual Dangers of Chatting on Facebook

Spiritual Dangers of Chatting on Facebook

I would rather....

I would rather present myself as I am than lie or disguise
I would rather you see my flaws than pretend at perfection
I would rather ask Jesus to change and mould me into his image
I would rather take the risk of vulnerability than hide in fear of pain

I would rather cry than live in a false sense of comfort and security.
I would rather give away my last penny to someone in need than watch them die
I would rather have Jesus than all the gold and silver in the world
I would rather be faithful until you don't want me any more
Than lose you because I was unfaithful

I would rather have two pairs of shoes than trade my dignity for a free walk in wardrobe full of them
I would rather have a long walk in the park, arm in arm with you  than all the glitz and glamor of the fast lane
A quiet evening spent in your arms by the fire place than the spotlight all night

I would rather humble myself before the Living God YHWH
than be exalted here on earth
I would rather spend time in his presence than fulfilling my desires
I would rather have a life full of adventurous uncertainty than to know all that will happen before hand
I would rather have a good friend than a thousand ass kissers

I would rather have a warm cup of herbal tea than booze
I would rather use my words to build than to destroy
My hands to work than to steal
and my voice to sing praises to God than to exalt foolish human pride

I would rather have you read this and think of what you would rather do
than to read it and judge me
I would rather we talk than to be talked at or talked down to
I would rather be me than anyone else
Because this is who I am and I embrace it

I would rather be right here where I am
even  if it gets confusing, scary or sad
than be elsewhere where I ought not to be and be without any strife
I would rather let go and let God than keep holding on to my pain
I would rather his peace than my despair
I would rather Jesus' victory than fear in the realm of the evil one

I would rather write my blog than gossip
I would rather take a deep breath and a walk than slap that person who disrespects my mother
breaks my heart, calls me names or slanders me
I would rather leave vengeance to God for he declares vengeance is his....
I would rather say let the Lord be the judge between you and me
And let the Holy Spirit convict you of your wrong doing than point a finger

All this I would rather do, be, see, say , feel, know, risk, give, experience, believe and love.....